Q&A: About choosing the language for day care, stuttering and mixing languages

by | Oct 8, 2017 | Babies, Challenges, Coaches, Language development, Q&A When a bilingual / multilingual child goes to school, Rita R | 3 comments

About choosing the language for day care, stuttering and mixing languages





I am Macedonian living in Finland and my spouse is Finnish. I speak quite good English but at home we speak Finnish almost all the time. We have 2,5 months old baby for whose future I’d like her to speak Macedonian and Finnish and to learn English as well. I am struggling between two options in about a year’s time when our daughter starts day care:

  1. OPOL (mum Macedonian, dad Finnish) and English/Finnish day care
  2. OPOL (mum Macedonian, dad Finnish) and Finnish day care and learning English through songs and she might learn some words from her brother who is 15 and prefers to speak English sometimes at home.

I was quite convinced we should take the option 1 but my spouse prefers option 2 as we’ve heard of such cases when trilingual children have problems with mixing and speaking, as well as stuttering which worries me the most.

Would you please kindly suggest on our situation, and many thanks for your help!


Dear Julija

Thank you for your question about choosing the day care language/s for your little daughter.

First, I would like to address you last comment about stuttering. There is no evidence that bilingualism causes stuttering (the definition of a bilingual is someone who speaks more than one language, be it two, three or more). Of course, bilinguals can stutter just like monolinguals, but research has found no cause and effect relation between the two. People who experience stuttering will do so independent of how many languages they speak. Stuttering is often more prominent in situations where a person is nervous. If a bilingual child with a tendency for stuttering is very apprehensive about using one of his or her languages, then this may lead to the stuttering being more noticeable in that situation. The stuttering is however not aggravated because of the language, but by the uncertainty of the situation itself. Hence, it is not recommended to stop speaking a language (which would lead to even more apprehensiveness), but to support a child with the language to build up confidence.

Having taken the stuttering out of the question, let’s briefly touch on mixing languages. It is perfectly normal for a child who learns two or more languages to initially mix them – this is nothing to worry about. Bilingualism does not cause language confusion.

I often come across anecdotal “evidence” about cases of bilingual children who have “problems” with mixing, stuttering, not knowing any language properly – the list goes on. The real problem usually lies with the person observing these situations and only seeing a fragment of a child’s communication. The observer is not knowledgeable about how bilingual children acquire their languages (or, is against bilingualism of some reason) and so the Chinese whispers start. This is how myths are created and perpetuated. Let’s all do our best to stop them from spreading!

Back to your question about choosing the language(s) for your daughter’s day care. As I understand it, you are the only person who speaks Macedonian with your daughter and your home language is Finnish. (You did not mention which language your 15-year-old normally speaks). In any case, Macedonian will be the language that your daughter will have a restricted amount of exposure to.

You live in Finland, so Finnish will soon become your daughter’s strongest language. For her to learn, maintain and develop her Macedonian it is important that you are as consistent as possible in speaking the language with her.

As stated, putting your daughter in dual-language day care will not cause any of the issues you mention in your message. Yes, she might be using parts from different languages in the same sentence, or even in the same word, but that is part of the learning process – so please do not panic if it happens.

If you want your daughter to learn English early on, then I see no reason to not put her in the English-Finnish dual-language nursery. On the contrary, this may even support the Macedonian, as Finnish will have a less dominant role in her life, than if she were to attend an all-Finnish nursery.

All this said, don’t make language the only, or even the most important criteria when choosing day care. You want to make sure that you put her in the best possible care, where she will be happy, well taken care of and able to develop all her life skills in a fun, safe and supporting environment.

Wishing you a successful trilingual family journey!

Kind regards

Rita Rosenback

Rita Rosenback

Rita is an author, Family Language Coach, blogger and speaker, who was born into a bilingual family on the Swedish-speaking west coast of Finland. After studying languages in Finland and Germany she worked as a university teacher, translator, interpreter and manager of multinational teams. Rita is now a full-time writer and coach and has been living in the U.K. since 1998. Rita is the mother of two grown-up multilingual daughters, who are the inspiration for her book: “Bringing up a Bilingual Child”, an easy-to-read guide for parents, where she navigates the reader across the “Seven Cs of Multilingual Parenting: Communication, Confidence, Commitment, Consistency, Creativity, Culture and Celebration”. Currently English and Swedish are Rita’s main languages, but she instantly switches to Finnish or German or to her Finland-Swedish dialect when the opportunity presents itself (and when push comes to shove, she can communicate in a very basic Punjabi). Rita is the creator and driving force of this website, and she gives talks and holds workshops for parents and teachers on the topic of bilingual children. She also coaches families on how to make the most of their languages and raise their children to become confident speakers of the chosen languages.


  1. Sibylle

    Dear Julija,
    I have a now three year old German/English bilingual daughter. We did have a brief stuttering time. So I researched stuttering quite a lot. It has as Ruta mentioned nothing to do with the number of languages a child speaks. Sudden appearance of stuttering is quite common among 2-6 year olds who most often spoke their languag(s) fluid before, independent of the number of languages they speak, social background and parenting style.
    In 80% of the children the stutter disappears on its own. In case one of your children stutters, there are quiet a few excellent resources to help you as parents , teachers or person who stutters. In Germany there is a national stuttering self help association (Bundesvereinigung Stottern & Selbsthilfe e.V. (BVSS), http://www.bvss.de/ ) which offers excellent free consults of a language therapist via phone and has also a number of free downloads. We found the consultant extremely helpful. I am sure something similar exists in most countries.
    BTW my daughter no longer stutters and speaks both languages perfectly fluid (and in quite complex whole sentences for a 36 months old).

    Best of luck on your trilingual journey!

    P.S. several of my daughters friends is trilingual via OPOL and a good bilingual immersion day care. None of them have language delays or stuttering, just normal bilingual language mixing that sorted it self out over time. Most often say use a word from the other language, when they do not yet know it in the language they’re speaking at the moment…

  2. Sarah

    I guess it should be “but research has found NO cause and effect relation between the two”. Just thought I’d make a note before anyone panics! 🙂

    • Rita

      Absolutely! NO cause and effect between bilingualism and stuttering.
      Thank you for letting me know, Sarah, I have updated the post 🙂

      Kind regards


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